Roughly this time last year, I was at a garden party celebrating the engagement of one of my best friends. All the girls had grouped together discussing hen dos in the most vague way possible and whilst describing budgets I discreetly shared with the other bridesmaids “I’m not sure if I’ll still have a job in a few months…”
I was struggling, trying desperately hard to make a success of my new role which was an incredible opportunity as a recent graduate. Fast forward a year; The hen do has passed, and I’m running through the list in my head of things I need to pack for next week.
In the twelve months since I voiced my worries to relative strangers so many small things have changed in my life. I have joined the gym and started Slimming World, I have a small savings account, passed my driving test and; I have a new job.
Moving to a new job really helped me take control of my life.
Those months of really struggling to do well taught me that you can’t achieve everything just because you doggedly want to. Some goals needed to be retired, so others can be focused on. Dreading getting out of bed, the increasing knot of anxiety when someone comes to your desk, and quiet tears appearing on your journey home as you worry that the work you’ve done isn’t good enough are not acceptable ways to live.
Teasing your colleagues, and being mocked for your inability to capture anyones name first time on a phonecall are. Knowing at the end of the day you have really achieved something, and that you are part of a team that enjoy working with you and care about each other, is.
I am not a mental health blogger. At best I am a beauty and fashion blogger with a perchance for books, but the importance of looming after your own mental health has been so heavily on my mind. My previous work situation was something I had no experience with, and really learnt from. That change spurred me to change other aspects of my life, and those changes have made me so much happier.